forever APE: oched and ayed for noo

probably a week has passed since i last bored you all with tales of my travels, but i've been having a great time bumming around as usual. i caught the bus up from the mid-lands to glasgow, to meet with my mother's uncle, robert, who'd come out on a visit to australia about 12 years ago. he lives in the same are where my mum and gran grew up before migrating to australia, many moons ago. the bus ride took longer than i thought, although it said direct, i sat on my arse for about nine hours. upon arrival robert informed me that you could in fact do the same trip in a car, in roughly five hours, so i'm not sure whose direct route we were travelling on, but it seemed to duck and weave the motorway, like a bantam weight boxer. robert had not changed a bit, and spotted me immediately out of a crowd of tired fellow bus travellers. we rode the local bus out to wishaw, which is thirty minutes from the centre of glasgow, out to where robert lives. i was welcomed straight away by alice and my cousin gary, and i must admit i felt right a home. we sat up for while that night, me polishing off their beer supply, and robert matching me on the whiskeys and vodkas. since i've been gone from australia, i've discovered just how weird it is to travel for these long stretches, and how it leaves you neither tired, nor awake, but in some weird kind of lethargic limbo. late in the night, after crawling up onto gary's top bunk, sleep found me, just where i left it.
the next day we did a family tour around the areas where my mum and gran grew up. we went to mum's school, gran's school, houses that they lived, up to beautiful town called lanark, and then followed the clyde back down to wishaw. the houses and buildings in scotland are really beautiful, and the majority of them seem unchanged on the outside from the ye olde days, giving a really warm and comfortable feeling. i had a really nice day driving around with robert, and came away with a greater understanding of where my mum and gran have come from. as he rattled on about the history of the area, he afterwards admitted that some it might not be true, as his history knowledge was rubbish. after reassuring him that i was really in no position to dispute any of these facts either way, he was happy enough and decided to take me down to his golf club, for a quick pint or two at the 19th hole. i meet a few colourful locals, who wasted no time in taking the piss out of robert, in a traditional scottish manner. robert checked his watch more than once, just to make sure we wouldn't get in trouble from alice back home, and we left the club, promising to return for a quick 18 the next day. again, robert and i sat up watching football that night (three games a day. sheesh), and sharing a few drinks until the wee hours. i think i found myself a brand new best friend. i went to sleep wishing that i was retired, spending my days and nights hanging out with robert in wishaw.
my name is a traditional family name, and there isn't too many hugh's left in the blood line. the one other hugh i know of, lives in canada, and is actually robert's best friend. they go over to canada once every couple of years and spend time over there. i found out that i was lucky enough to have my trip at the same time that the other hugh was in scotland. a whiff of a game of golf was all the motivation he needed to come over early the morning, and the three of us set out for the course. it was weird because for the first time in my life, i had to understand that when someone said hugh, that it didn't always mean me, but i got the hang of it. 18 holes of golf later, and i couldn't help thinking that perhaps they'd invited me along, just to make both there golfing games look good. i'm rubbish at golf, and always have been, but i hacked my way around, and had a really good time. then came the pints afterwards. both hugh and i being visitors, almost everyone in the clubhouse wanted to shout us pints. we were more than happy, but had to decline the offer of a few more, to get back to robert's, and have some dinner with the rest of the family. i got to meet and hang out with some other relatives of mine, which i can't work out in words, how to explain the bloodline relationship of. there was me, robert, alice, hugh, his wife nan, and his daughter julie, and her wee daughter kylie, as well as robert and alice's boy gary. we had a great time, trying to explain where we all fit. so nice to be meeting all this family. i'm a lucky boy.
next stop is glasgow for a couple of days. i'm staying with some friends doon (sic) there, and they've promised me a good time or two. i'll keep you posted.